Throwing Mother Off the Pier

by Sarah Longley

It’s today…
The final letting go
After so many years in anticipation of this moment
How will it actually feel?

A lifetime spent building walls, brick by brick
Mortared together firmly
With our unique family recipe
Of anger, resentment, sadness, and longing

So contrary to that which you espoused
A closeness that existed
Merely as an adornment, for public approval
And admiration or envy by those who looked on

Not a single tear has been shed
No wistful memories float into the subconscious
To catch me unaware
And remind me you are gone, for you were never really there

Today, as you descend into the murky depths
Take with you all that you gave, and more
Carry off onto the noon-day tide
All of the bitterness that has tainted my heart

At last, a corner has been turned, and your shadow can no longer follow
But perhaps it can watch from a distance
As each brick is dismantled
And the walls crumble away.



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